I came face-to-face with my own money dysfunction last weekend, all because of some truly wonderful people in my life who have a lot more stuff than I do. I would just like to say that, just because I write about the emotional and psychological aspects of money doesn’t mean that I am immune to their dysfunctions. I am simply more aware of them.
I am thoroughly content with my house, my neighborhood and my diamond engagement ring. But appreciating these things does not prevent me from becoming a wee bit envious when someone in my circle has a bigger or nicer house, lives in a little more elegant neighborhood or wears a larger diamond. I emphasized “in my circle” because I certainly work with people regularly who have more assets than I do. I don’t socialize with them, though.
This got me thinking…how can I attract more financial abundance into my own life if I am at all concerned about what others may think about it? I certainly don’t want to make anyone jealous of me (in fact, I think that’s why I am always sneaking complaints into conversations, almost to apologize for any blessing I do have so as not to appear as if I’m bragging). (Does anyone else do this?)
I suspect more of this goes on than we realize and perhaps it’s preventing us from either appreciating what we have or striving for more of what we want. But, wait, aren’t we suppsoed to be content and not want more? Or should we always be striving for more? More…what?
Do you admire people who have a lot of financial abundance or do you think they’re greedy? Do you assume their lives must possess other challenges to balance out their financial situation? Perhaps is this one excuse your subconscious mind is using to keep you from obtaining financial abundance: because you believe your friendships, health or something else will suffer as a consequence.
I know a family who recently lost their mother. Most of the family is in one geographic area but one sibling lives out of town. Because she could not be around to help take care of mom, she offered to send some money to help with the house, aides, etc…her siblings were mad at her, thinking she was trying to show off her money and buy her way out of the caregiving. What else could she do? Quit her job? Move her family? Why were her siblings really upset?
Should she have not sent the money?
We tend to hang out with people who share similar views and values with us (this is probably why some friends become more like family than family) or who are in a similar place in their lives (i.e. having young children, retired, young & unmarried etc…). I wonder how many of us spend time with people who have the same life values but significantly different portfolio values than we have.